Mistresses, Slaves and Submissives

…Apparently slaves and submissives are 2 different things! Or so I learnt in my Mistress class for beginners I attended on the Saturday just gone.

I booked this class 2 weeks before hand and once I paid the deposit, I had to go. I have always wanted to explore the fetish scene but never really had the knowledge on where to begin. Funnily enough I found this class through my Twitter account (@confessdating) and I had no idea what I was in for when I booked it!

I did not know there were so many fetishes and so many definitions and types of Mistresses and slaves! Let me breakdown some of what I learnt:

Slaves = These people are there for YOUR pleasure and to do what YOU want, clean, cook etc.

Submissive = They will tell you what THEY want and what THEY enjoy and you just act it out as their Mistress. You are obviously still in control.

Pro Domme = I’m pretty sure if I remember correctly that they do this for a living.

Goddess = Have people lounging around all the time doing what every she wants and they are like puppies.

Findom = A Dom who pretends to be this princess who sits on her satin pillows all day and men send her money and gifts. She has to maintain this persona online all the time. It is not necessary for her to meet them in person or show her flesh.

Mistress = Is as the word means, bit on the side! Not always though! Doesn’t have to be about sex and you can get paid if you want to!

That was just a snippet of what I learnt. People often have this perception of a Pro – Domme or a Mistress as a this tough woman who whips men. No! Not at all! I was so relieved to hear that you do not have to be that way to be a Mistress because I much prefer to give pleasure than pain! I believe the pain part compliments the pleasure in that the pleasure is heightened in a way. I would just like to be in control of that pleasure, and thats the kind of Mistress I would be should I decide I want to be one! The Mistress that was taking the class also mentioned that there are certain things she does not do, and as a Mistress you don’t have to do everything! A common misconception! I don’t think I could put needles in someone for example but there’s other stuff I would do. She also mentioned that she only “plays” with guys that she fancies otherwise she sees no point! They give her something like fixing up her house, and they get what they want which isn’t always sex, sounds like a pretty amazing deal to me!

Then came the rope bondage….

I, fucking, loved it! I need to go to another class that specifically teaches rope bondage! There was something about the restriction of the chest harness and the control of my pleasure being in someone else’s hands that was great! There was no nudity or anything; that would have been a fetish party!

I am not sure how far I will delve into this fetish scene… maybe not so much that my blog has to change to Confessions of the Mistress! But maybe enough to give those of you who know little to nothing about the scene some insight.

I will keep you posted!



OMG you are beautiful!

Now there is no doubt about it that there are incredibly beautiful men out there and equally women but half the time they are not all they are cracked up to be, here’s a few things that you MUST think about from my experience:

  1. If this beautiful person is not smiling with their teeth in all pictures they send you/show on their profile pictures they are more than likely going to have the most horrendous teeth on the planet. Teeth for me are a massive part of attraction and I personally cannot handle dirty teeth.
  2. Guys who take chest pictures of themselves need to calm down, yes you have a nice body but this person more than likely wants to have sex and nothing else. If they save those pictures for you until after you talk, exchange numbers and meet then they aren’t as full of themselves as the others. They know they have a personality to back themselves up.
  3. Beautiful people can be crazy too, they may not be wheedling a gun or a machete in their hands in the picture that you are seeing but don’t get too hooked up on their looks because they may just not be who you really want them to be. They could be crazy with a fetish for GBH or murder or they are just boring…
  4. Good looking people are not always good kissers… they are good looking because they may be compensating for something else. Well… it wouldn’t be fair if they were perfect right? God wouldn’t make someone so prefect right?… Right? hmmm
  5. If you cannot see their face very well it is for a reason… They are letting their body do all the talking! When you see their face you may just get the shock of your life! Remember ANYONE can have a good body with the right diet, exercise and motivation.
  6. If someone is constantly messaging you and you have ignored them before then DO NOT give in! This is a straight up trait of desperation! If they then insult you because you have not responded then even more reason to stay away because they are trying to guilt trip you! Now no one wants a relationship with someone like that now do they? If this has not happened to you then count yourself lucky!

    This guy would not leave me alone after I told him I am not giving him my number!

    This guy would not leave me alone after I told him I am not giving him my number!

Okay so what we have learnt from these points is to go with someone who is mediocre… sorted!

Just a tip for men… Don’t be a little bitch its a turn off! Play it cool and don’t act so desperate! Especially 2 hours after the original message! I may have just been interested but busy!!!:

I’m definitely not going to message you back now!

desperation at its finest!

desperation at its finest!

– ConfessionsOfTheConfusedWoman